The Break Up~

If only we were dating--then it would be so much simpler. "It's not you...it's me. I'm just not ready for this type of commitment. I think we should see other people."

There is no easy way out of this one. It's going to end up all messy and uncomfortable. Is there protocol for "breaking up" with a roommate? Is there some way I can let her down gently? Let's add insult to injury--she's not just my roommate--she's the soon to be sister-in-law to my sister. Damn. Talk about all tied up and connected: her brother is marrying my sister. I can't just ditch her and move on with my life. There's gonna be weddings, nieces and nephews, Christmas dinners and birthday parties.

Messy or not--I'm ready for splitsville. I suppose I have to do it proper--no text messages, emails or notes. This is going to be a face to face battle. One I'm not sure I'm ready for, but hell, beats the alternative. I've given it the ol' college try. I made up my mind we could be friends like we used to, go back to the good times. It took less than an hour of speaking to make me realize that ship has sailed.

I'm at the point I don't even want to be around her. I don't want to talk. I don't want to share my life. I want no opinions about anything from her, ever again. At the same time I want to keep the value in what used to be our friendship. It wasn't a small thing to me, now or ever, but it's not the same and it never will be. I have always been a good, supporting friend; it's the reciprocation that's missing. I don't feel respected--my space, my decisions, my posessions. I want to be civil and honest; I don't want to burn bridges my family'll be crossing in the future. Living with her each day is making the end that much worse. I'm getting angrier and it's going to be ugly unless I get out of her asap!

There are times I just want to be honest and remind her she's a huge pain in the ass. Loudly. With a lot of expletives. Remind her she doesn't have all the life experience she thinks she has. Remind her the baby princess is just a fantasy, and it's over now. Mostly I just want her to butt out of my life.

Sure, there are going to be weddings, nieces and nephews, Christmas dinners and birthday parties. But I can suck it up and deal, because to be completely honest--it's not me--it's her!