Family Ties~

"Your brother's been arrested."

How do you align your mind and your heart once these words have been spoken?

My mind is saying this was bound to happen. My heart is seeing my little brother getting handcuffed and thrown into the backseat of a police car.

My mind is saying this could be the best thing for him. My heart is breaking in two.

My mind is walking away. I'm leaving him to deal with the repercussions, letting him deal with the consequences of his own actions. My heart is thinking of strategies, opportunities, ways to save him.

Typically I've let my heart lead me. With reckless abandon. I firmly believe it's better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all. All those times I've been hurt because I turned off the voices in my head screaming at me to stop, turn around, run; I'm a better person because of those lessons.
Because of the lessons I've learned letting my heart lead me, I'm who I am today.

Now I'm just torn in half. With a sickening, sinking feeling.

My mind is saying that he's going to do exactly what he wants to do. No marijuana bust is gonna stop him. My heart is saying that I can reach him this time, I can help.

The sickening thing is that I think I've already resigned myself to letting my mind handle this one. I can't save him, he doesn't even want to be saved.

I love my brother. My heart is overflowing with love.

My mind is telling me I'm no martyr, and it's foolish to think anything else.

My heart is still breaking.